Culture: Intellectual and artistic activity and the works produced by it; Development of the intellect through training or education; Enlightenment resulting from such training or education.

Savage: A person regarded as not domesticated or cultivated; wild, barbaric, fierce.

I love classical music, jazz, old school country, hard rock and indi punk. I seek out artistic movies and intellectually driven books while laughing at slapstick antics and bathroom humor. Articulating myself with carefully chosen words from a broad vocabulary is very important to me, yet I pray from the pulpit of church, “God, you’re freak’n awesome!” Dichotomy is a familiar word to me.

The question of “Who am I?” has been a constant companion since high school. Some days my sense of self is so strong that I am unwaveringly sure of what my life will accomplish, and other months I feel that I will never find my true identity. During these latter times, I feel as if I must choose “one side” of my personality over the other. It is not a choice of preference, like choosing a tuna fish sandwitch over peanut butter. It is choosing to anathematize the choice to pursue writing, ministry, music… whatever happens to be on the chopping block at the moment. Decisions like this send me into a pendulum swing of tragic proportions. Trying to extricate one aspect of self from the other is like trying to play guitar after sawing off an arm: messy, bloody, and sounds like crap.

At some point in my maturation process (think aged cheese rather than becoming adult), I discovered that while I must still wrestle with the question of identity, the end is not either/or. I am an “and” kind of person: I am intellectual and passionate; I pursue theology and art. The nom de plume “Cultural Savage” reminds me of the two halves to my whole. I need both of them for balance and holistic faith. “Culture” speaks of the quest for enlightenment and intellectual understanding - the learning to articulate thought and Biblical insight in progressive and creative ways. “Savage” screams for passion, music that rocks, wine, and a God that is real and active in the midst of my tragedy.

I need these two halves; they are my whole only when intertwined and indistinguishable from the other. Only with all that I have can I lay down my life, pick up my cross and follow Christ. But, this is faith… and both culture and savage want reckless, beautiful, bloody, thought provoking, real salvation.